Best jokes

What happened to Chelsea Clinton's younger brother?
→ Monica swallowed him!

What is the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?
→ Lipstick

Sung to the Oscar Mayer? song:
His baloney has a first name,
It's:

- I did not inhale.

His baloney has a second name:

- I wasn't getting tail.

He loves to sling it every day,
The White House people all just say,
That Billy Clinton has a way
Of making bullshit sound OK!"

- Knock Knock...

- Who's There?

- Boo...

- Boo Who?

- Stop crying it's just a joke!

How do you catch a unique rabbit?
→ Unique up on him.

How do you catch a tame rabbit?
→ Tame way, unique up on him.

Is that your head or is your neck blowing a bubble?

Don't let your mind wander too far. It is too little to go out alone!

What happens when you play Country music records backwards?
→ You Sober up, your wife comes home and your dog returns to life!

Two Boll Weevils grew up in South Carolina, one went to Hollywood and became a famous actor while the other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much.

The second one, naturally, became known as the "lesser of two weevils."

A three legged dog walks into a saloon in the old west and siddles up to the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw!"