Random joke from this category
Interesting things about Monica Lewinsky:
Who does she think she is, Microsoft Windows?
A surgeon and an architect, both English, were joined by an Irish politician, and all fell to arguing as to whose profession was the oldest. Said the surgeon, "Eve was made from Adam's rib, and that surely was a surgical operation." "Maybe," said the architect, "but prior to that, order was created out of chaos, and that was an architectural job." "Shure now," interrupted the politician, "but somebody created the chaos first."
Why doesn't Hillary wear short dress?
→ Her balls would show.
The population of the United States was 180 million at the time of writing, but there are 64 million over 60 years of age, leaving 116 million to do the work.
People under 21 total 59 million which leaves 57 million people to do the work.
Because of the 31 million government employees, there are only 26 million left to do the work.
Six million in the armed forces leave twenty million workers.
Deduct 17 million State, county, and city employees, and we are left with three million to do the work.
There are 2,500,000 people in hospitals, asylums, and treatment facilities leaving half a million workers.
However, 450,000 of these are bums or others who will not work, leaving 50,000 to do the work.
Now, it may interest you to know that there are 49,998 people in jail so that leaves just 2 people to do all the work, and that is you and me, and I'm getting tired of doing everything myself!
Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton on a recent flight.
After the plane was airborne, the flight attendant came around for drink orders.
The President asked for a whisky & soda, which was brought and placed before him. The attendant then asked the minister if he would also like a drink.
The minister replied in disgust, "Ma'am, I'd rather be savagely raped by a brazen whore than let liquor touch these lips!"
The President then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't know there was a choice..."
What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
→ 1 U.S. leader
There is also a joke about the last Mayday parade in the Soviet Union.
After the tanks and the troops and the planes and the missiles rolled by there came ten men dressed in black. "Are they Spies?" Asked Gorby? "They are economists," replies the KGB director, "imagine the havoc they will wreak when we set them loose on the Americans"
What is 1 + 2?
- Politician: Well, if you look at the seasonally adjusted figures, you'll find that it's reasonably in line with government predictions.
- Physicist: I won't tell you until you tell me what you want to use it for.
- Lawyer: It makes one and a half each.
What did George W Bush get on his S.A.T.'s?
→ Drool.
Did you hear the latest theory about Monica Lewinsky?
→ It may never be proven but they think she may be the youngest woman to have ever held the Presidency.
