Language Jokes — most viewed jokes

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Canoe

- Canoe who?

- Canoe come out and play with me?

What did the Eskimo children sing when their principal was leaving?
→ Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

Name a fawn, a lawn and a yawn.
→ Bambi, the White House grounds, and the new TV season.

A very important event is going to happen on May the 4th. I'm telling you so early because it's so important. I urge each of you to mark that date on your calendars with the letters BU. It's very important that you include the letter B with the letter U; you may miss the importance of the event without it.

So go now, and mark your calendars. Keep repeating to yourselves as you walk to the calendar, so you don't forget: May the 4th, B with U; May the 4th, B with U....

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bumbry

- Bumbry who?

- Bumbry tuna!

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
→ Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls (bagels, get it?).

What is a polygon?
→ A dead parrot!

I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double.

The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

• Dung On MAI Shu - I stepped in excrement
• Ai Wan Tu Bang Yu - Let's sleep together
• Ai Bang Mai Ne - I bumped into the coffee table
• Fat Ho - An unattractive woman
• Ar U Wun Tu - A gay liberation greeting
• Chin Tu Fat - You need a face lift
• Chow Mai Dong - Romantic proposition
• Dum Gai - A stupid person
• Wel Hung Gai - Is that a banana in your pocket?
• Won Hung Low - Southern Chinese dialect for Wel Hung Gai
• Gun Pao Der - An ancient Chinese invention
• Hu Flung Dung - Which one of you fertilized the field?
• Hu Yu Hai Ding - We have reason to believe you are harboring a fugutive
• Jan Ne Ka Sun - A former late night talk show host
• Kum Hia - Approach me
• Lao Ze Sho - Gilligan's Island
• Lao Zi - Not very good
• Lin Ching - An illegal execution
• Moon Lan Ding - A great achievement of the American space program
• Ne Ahn - A lighting fixture used in advertising signs
• Shai Gai - A bashful person
• Tai Ne Bae Be - A premature infant
• Tai Ne Po Ne - A small horse
• Ten Ding Ba - Serving drinks to people
• Wan Bum Lung - A person with T.B.
• Yu Mai Te Tan - Your vacation in Hawaii agrees with you
• Wa Shing Kah - Cleaning an automobile
• Wai So Dim - Are you trying to save electricity?
• Wai U Shao Ting - There is no reason to raise your voice

Two americans were walking through Leicester but couldn't agree on how to pronounce it so they decided to stop for lunch and ask the waitress.

They sat down to eat their lunch and called the waitress over: "Can you tell us where we are please but say it slowly", to which the waiteress replied "Bur-ger Ki-ng"