Random joke from this category
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."
A blonde and a brunette both jumped off a cliff at the same time. Which made it to the ground first?
→ The brunette because the blonde had to stop and ask for directions.
NEW INVENTIONS BY BLONDES:
A smart blonde and a dumb blonde both jump off a cliff at the same time. Who lands first?
→ The dumb blonde because smart blondes don't exist.
A blonde goes horse back riding. It starts out slow, but then it starts to gallop. The blonde is enjoying herself. All of a sudden she slips off and her foot gets caught in the reins. The horse doesn't stop and the blonde is still being dragged upside down. She doesn't know what to do. Finally the Wal-Mart manager comes and unplugs it.
A blonde went in the library and walked up to the librarian behind the desk and said, "I would like a cheeseburger."
The librarian replied, "Shh! This is a library!"
The blonde blushed. "oh, sorry.." then she whispered, "I would like a cheeseburger."
Once there was this guy, and he was driving in his car, and all of a sudden, he sees the Easter Bunny hopping on the road. Well, he was going too fast, and he didn't hit the brakes in time, so he hit the Easter Bunny.
He was really upset, and was thinking, "Oh no, what about all those poor little kids?? What can I do!?" Then, a blonde drove up in her car, and asked, "What's wrong?" "I hit the Easter Bunny!!" said the guy. "Oh, I know what to do," said the blonde, and she went into her car, got a can, and sprayed the Easter Bunny with it.
A few minutes later, the Easter Bunny got up, hopped a little bit, turned around and waved, hopped a little, turned around and waved, and it kept doing that. When the Easter Bunny was out of sight, the guy turned to the blonde and asked, "Wow, I'm dying to know what was in that can!!"
"Oh," said the blonde, "It was hair spray. It says, 'Spray on dead hair for permanent wave.'"
What's the difference between Indiana and a blonde?
→ A blonde has larger hills and deeper valleys.
A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs.
"No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"
How does a blonde change a lightbulb?
→ She says, "Daddy, I want a new apartment."
