Police Jokes — most commented jokes

Why don't more dinosaurs join the police force?
→ They can't hide behind billboards.

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?
→ Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say, "Jesus is watching you!" Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. "Jesus is watching you," the voice boomed again. The burglar stopped dead again. He was frightened.
Frantically, he looked all around. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. He asked the parrot: "Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?"
"Yes," said the parrot.
The burglar breathed a sigh of relief and asked the parrot: "What's your name?"
"Clarence," said the bird.
"That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burglar. "What idiot named you Clarence?"
The parrot said, "The same idiot who named the Rottweiller Jesus."

- Bill: Where did you get that gold watch Joe?

- Joe: I won it in a race.

- Bill: How many people participated in it?

- Joe: Three, a policeman, the owner of the watch, and me!!

Did you hear about the calendar thief?
→ He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered!

A rapist, a gangster and a murderer are in the same car...
Who is driving the car?
→ A police officer!

A mafioso's son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy the whole year, so I want a new..." He looks at it, then crumples it up into a ball and throws it away.

He gets out a new piece of paper and writes again, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy for most of the year, so I want a new..." He again looks at it with disgust and throws it away.

He then gets an idea. He goes into his mother's room, takes a statue of the Virgin Mary, puts it in the closet, and locks the door. He takes another piece of paper and writes, "Dear baby Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again..."

It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with?"

"Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

"That's no offense," said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?"

"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Burglar

- Burglar who?

- Burglars don't knock!

What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner?
→ A Kong - vict!