Blonde Jokes — best jokes

Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
→ You can park in the handicap zone.

What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
→ Hump me Dump me.

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled:

- GREEN SIDE UP!

The lady then asked him:

- Why do you keep yelling green side up?

- I'm sorry - came the reply.

- But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.

Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes?
→ They're doing research on black holes.

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?
→ It takes too long to retrain them.

What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side?
→ An interpreter.

What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
→ A mental block.

What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
→ You only have to punch information into a computer once!

What do a blonde and your computer have in common?
→ You don't know how much either of them mean to you until they go down on you.

Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
→ (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!

How do you kill a blonde?
→ Put spikes in their shoulder pads.

How do blondes pierce their ears?
→ They put tacks in their shoulder pads.