Swint and Fess, two Oklahoma cowboys, were resting their horses out on the range.
- What'd Emmaline give yew for yore birthday? - asked Swint
- Pair of cufflinks - said Fess
- But I ain't got no use for them. I can't even find anyplace to get my wrists pierced.
Who do zombie cowboys fight?
→ Deadskins.
The swing doors of the Wild West saloon crashed open and in came Little Pete, black with fury.
- All right! - he raged
- all right! Who did it? What goldarned varmint painted my horse blue?
The huge figure of Black Jake, notorious gunfighter and town baddie rose from a chair by the door.
- It was me, shrimp - he drawled, bunching his gigantic fists
- what about it?
- Oh, well, er - stammered little Pete wretchedly
- all I wanted to say was. . .when are you going to give it another coat?
- Visitor: Wow, you have a lot of flies buzzing round your horses and cows. Do you ever shoo them?
- Cowboy: No we just let them go barefoot.
A police officer saw a man dressed as a cowboy in the street, complete with huge stetson hat, spurs, and six shooters.
- Excuse me, sir, who are you?
- My name's Tex, officer.
- Tex, eh? Are you from Texas?
- Nope, Louisiana.
- Louisiana? So why are you called Tex?
- Don't want to be called Louise, do I?
What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
→ Hoppalong Cassidy.
Who is in cowboy films and is always broke?
→ Skint Eastwood.
What did the cowboy maggot say when he went into the saloon bar?
→ Gimme a slug of whiskey.
Who do zombie cowboys fight?
→ Deadskins.
Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church:
- When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral - Joe began
- You mean the parking lot - interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow
- I walked up the trail to the door - Joe continued
- The sidewalk to the door - Charlie corrected him
- Inside the door, I was met by this dude - Joe went on
- That would be the usher - Charlie explained
- Well, the usher led me down the chute - Joe said
- You mean the aisle - Charlie said
- Then, he led me to a stall and told me to sit there - Joe continued
- Pew - Charlie retorted
- Yeah - recalled Joe
- That's what that pretty lady said when I sat down beside her.
