A policeman pulled a blonde over after she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street.
- Cop: Do you know where you were going?
- Blonde: No, but wherever it is, it must be bad, cause all the people were leaving!
A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:
- Brunette: Last night I had three orgasms in a row!!
- Blonde: That's nothing; last night I had over hundred.
- Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.
- Blonde: (looking shocked) oh, you meant with one guy...
Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
→ Because red means stop.
What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home?
→ She moved.
Why do blondes wear underwear?
→ They make good ankle warmers.
What's a blonde's favorite wine?
→ "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!"
Why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts?
→ Cause their balls show!
Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
→ To see what was on the other side.
What do you call a zit on a blonde's butt?
→ A brain tumor.
A midget with a heavy lisp goes to a horse farm to purchase a horse. The owner of the farm takes him through to look at all of his horses. The owner is really getting pissed off.
Finally, the last horse and the midget decided that he really wanted this horse. So he ask the owner if he could lift him up so he could look at the horses eyes. The owner did as the midget asked, and the midget said "Oh my, thse got very pretty eyez".
Then the midget ask if he could lift him up so he could see her teeth, Then the midget said "Oh wow, thse got wonderful teeth. Then the midget ask if he could see her twat. The owner, being very pissed, picked him up, and rammed him in and out of the horse's twat.
The midget looked up at the owner and said. "Oh my, yes she does have a very fine twat, but I guess I thoud have asked to see her gallop."
