Ethnic — most viewed jokes

How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast?
→ They marched in backwards and the Polish thought they were leaving.

When young Jose, newly arrived in the United States, made his first trip to Yankee Stadium, there were no tickets left for sale. Touched by his disappointment, a friendly ticket salesman found him a perch near the American flag. Later, Jose wrote home enthusiastically about his experience. "And the Americans, they are so friendly!" he concluded. "Before the game started, they all stood up and looked at me and sang, .... 'Jose, can you see?'"

A guy is strolling along a sandy beach one day when he comes across a very old bottle. He's just dusting it off when two rather tired looking genies pop out. "Two genies!" he exclaims. "That must mean six wishes!"
"Sorry, buddy, it's three or nuthin'," say the genies, "and hurry up".
The guy makes his three wishes and races off home to see if they've been granted. He gets home and runs into his bedroom, where he finds the most gorgeous girl he has ever seen waiting for him.
After hours of mad, passionate sex, he stumbles out of bed and walks into the living room where he is knee deep in $1000 bills.
The guy can hardly believe his luck.
Just then there is a knock at the door. He rushes over to open it, when two hooded KKK members throw a rope around his neck and string him up naked until he is dead.
The two then take off their white hoods to reveal that they are, in fact, the two genies, both looking rather puzzled.
The first genie turns to the second and says, "I can understand the beautiful woman and all the money in the world, by why on earth would you want to be hung like a black man?"

Back in the old west, there was a need to connect the east and the west with a telegraph line. The Manager of the project advertised for workers to complete the job. Three groups responded. A team of Irishmen, a group of Italians, and a final team composed of Blondes.

Since none of the groups would work with anyone from the other two groups, the project supervisor decided to assign each group to a different part of the line, and then see which team set the most poles.

The first task was to set the poles. The Supervisor sent each group out to a different location. Before they left, he advised all three groups that the one to bury the most poles today, would receive a bonus.

At the end of the day, the foreman of the Italians reported back to the Supervisor. The Supervisor inquired of him how many poles had been set by his team. He answered 48. The Supervisor was delighted. He advised the Italian to stay awhile until he heard how the Irishmen and the Blondes had done...

Next to report was the foreman of the Irishmen group. When asked, he reported that they had set 53 poles that day. Again the Superivsor was thrilled. He dismissed the Italian foreman and asked the Irishman to remain until the Blondes checked in.

A little while later the Blonde forewoman reported to the Supervisor. "How many poles did your group set?" He asked. "Two." Replied the Blonde forewoman. "What! Just, two!" exclaimed the Supervisor. "The Italians set 48 poles, and the Irishmen set 53. How could you Blondes have only set two poles?"

"It may be true the Italians and Irishmen buried more poles than us," replied the Blonde. "But you should see how much of the poles those bozos left sticking out of the ground!"

A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in the house?!"

Several men stood up as the lights came on.

An older lady pulled her daughter to stand next to her, "Good, are any of you doctors single and interested in a date with a good, Jewish girl?"

What do you call counterfeited German currency?
→ Question marks.

Did you hear about the Oklahoma idiot who married an American Indian? They had a baby and wanted to name it to reflect both races.
So they called it Running Dummy.

Why did the Aggie think the weatherman got the sunny forecast wrong?
→ The Aggie drove through a car wash

How many polaks does it take to kidnap a child?
→ 12. One to kidnap the child and the remaining 11 to write a ransom letter.

Why do Polish police cars have stripes on the side?
→ So the cops can find the handles.