Mom/Dad Jokes — most commented jokes

What did the little ghost give his mom for Mother's Day?
→ A booquet of flowers.

What did the mother ghost tell the kid ghost when he went out to play?
→ "Don't get your sheets dirty!"

What did the mother ghost say to the naughty baby ghost?
→ Spook when you're spooken to.

- Jimmy, how many more times must I tell you to come away from that cookie tin?

- No more, mom. It's empty.

- Boy: What's black, slimy, with hairy legs and eyes on stalks?

- Mom: Eat the cookies and don't worry about what's in the tin.

- Mom: Fred, there were two chocolate cakes in the larder yesterday, and now there's only one. Why?

- Fred: I don't know. It must have been so dark I didn't see the other one.

- Mummy! Mummy! Have you seen my Cabbage Patch Doll?

- Be quiet and finish your coleslaw!

- Fred! What did I say I'd do if I found you with your fingers in the butter again?

- That's funny, Mom. I can't remember either.

- Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?

- Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things during meals!

- Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the question?

- Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but now it's gone.

A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"

The father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, "How do fish breath underwater?"

Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?"

Again, the father repied. "Don't rightly know son." Finally, the boy asked his father, "Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?"

The father replied, "Of course not, you don't ask questions, you never learn nothin'."