Random joke from this category
- Man: How's your history paper coming?
- Woman: Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it's been very helpful.
- Man: Really?
- Woman: Yes! I've already located 17 people who sell them!
A mother was teaching her three year old daughter The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride, as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end...
"And lead us not into temptation",
she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."
What do rabbits put in their computers?
→ Hoppy disks!
- Police Chief: Why did you ticket the computer?
- Officer: It was speeding along the information highway.
How can you tell if it was a shared computer used by many staffers?
→ There is writing on the White-out.
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
→ None. They have a machine that does that now.
Men are like computers.
Hard to figure out and never enough memory.
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
→ Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"
A friend of mine told me he had signed up with one of these on-line dating services. I asked him the other day if he had had any luck and he said he'd quit -- seems they'd matched him up with his wife.
An Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.
Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly woman whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.
At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:
DEAREST WIFE:
JUST GOT CHECKED IN.
EVERYTHING PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW.
YOUR LOVING HUSBAND
P.S. SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE
