Animal Jokes — most commented jokes

If you had a gun and you were being chased by a bull and a mountain lion, which one would you shoot first?
→ The mountain lion. You can always shoot the bull!

If you crossed two cows with a flock of ducks, what would you get?
→ Milk and quackers!

If you crossed a cow with Michael Jackson, what song would you get?
→ "Beeflt!"

If you crossed a cow with a goat, what would you get?
→ Half and half!

- I hear you take milk baths.

- That's right.

- Why?

- I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower!

- I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm.

- Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?

- I'd look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!

How do you know that cows will be in heaven?
→ It's a place of udder delight.

How does a cow do math?
→ With a cowculator!

How do you make a milkshake?
→ Give a cow a pogo stick.

How do bulls drive their cars?
→ They steer them!