Most commented jokes

A young woman was appearing in court to face a public disorder charge. The charges were read out, and she was asked how she pleaded.

- Not guilty - the woman answered emphatically.

The prosecution council then approached the woman and said:

- Is it true that on the 11th of December, last year, you committed an act of gross indecency with a one-legged dwarf - who was waving a union jack - on the roof of a car, whilst travelling at over 100mph through the center of London, in a blizzard?

The woman composed herself, looked straight at the prosecution council and calmly said:

- What was the date again?

People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.

- Judge: Is it true that you owe your neighbor a thousand dollars?

- Defendant: Yes, it's true.

- Judge: Then, why don't you just pay him back?

- Defendant: Because it wouldn't be true anymore.

The judge said to his dentist: "Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth."

The Judge asked the defendant:

- Mr. Jones, do you understand that you have sworn to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

- I do.

- Now what do you say to defend yourself?

- Your Honor, under those limitations... nothing.

How many editors does it take to change a lightbulb?
→ It was supposed to be in place last week!

How many publishers does it take to change a lightbulb?
→ Three. One to screw it in and two more to hold down the editor.

Who do you think was sent to cover the story of the baby lion born in the zoo?
→ A cub reporter.

An honest weatherman says, "Today's forecast is bright and sunny with an 80% chance that I'm wrong."

A weather forecaster took a job in another part of the country. When asked why he transferred he replied, "The weather didn't agree with me."