Stats/Math Jokes — most commented jokes

"Our teacher has a bad memory. For three days she asked us how much is two and two. We told her it was four. But she still doesn't know. Today she asked us again!"

- Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have?

- Jackie: Nine.

- Teacher: That's not right, you'd have eight.

- Jackie: No, Teacher, I'd have nine. I already have one rabbit at home!

- Fred: I've added these figures ten times.

- Teacher: Good work!

- Fred: And here are my ten answers!

- Teacher: Jackie, take 932 from 1,439. What is the difference?

- Stella: That's what I say, what's the difference?

- Teacher: Can you count to 10?

- Fred: Yes, teacher-one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

- Teacher: Now go on from there.

- Fred: Jack, Queen, King.

The teacher was reviewing counting with her first-grade class.

- Jackie, can you count to 10 without mistakes? - she asked.

- Yes - said Jackie, and she did.

- Now, Fred, can you count from 10 to 20? - said the teacher.

- That depends, with or without mistakes! - said Fred.

- Teacher: How much is half of 8

- Pupil: Up and down or across?

- Teacher: What do you mean?

- Pupil: Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0

- Teacher: What's 2 and 2

- Pupil: 4

- Teacher: That's good

- Pupil: Good?, that's perfect!

- Teacher: Are you good at math?

- Pupil: Yes and no

- Teacher: What do you mean?

- Pupil: Yes, I'm no good at math!

- Ann! - the teacher shouted one day at the girl who had been daydreaming out the window.

- If India has the world's second largest population, oranges are 50 cents for six and it costs $3 for a day return to Austin, how old am I?

- Thirty two!

- Why did you say that?

- Well, my brother's sixteen and he's half mad!