Science — most commented jokes

- Teacher: Can anyone give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze?

- Pupil: Hot water!

- Teacher: What can we do to stop polluting our waters?

- Pupil: Stop taking baths?

- Teacher: What is a comet?

- Pupil: A star with a tail

- Teacher: Can you name one?

- Pupil: Lassie!

- Teacher: What's happens to gold when it is exposed to the air?

- Pupil: It's stolen!

- Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is round

- Pupil: Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so!

- The brain is a wonderful thing

- Why do you say that?

- Because it starts working the second you get up in the morning and never stops until you get asked a question in class!

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information"

"To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.

"It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face."

"Yes, sir," the boys said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "It's because yer feet ain't empty."

An ideal homework excuse

- Teacher: Where is your homework?

- Pupil: Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked

When is a pig an ecologist?
→ When he recycles garbage into ham.