Random joke from this category
A couple have not been getting along for years, so the husband thinks, "I'll buy my wife a cemetery plot for her birthday."
Well, you can imagine her disappointment.
The next year, her birthday rolls around again and this time he doesn't get her anything.
She says, "Why didn't you get me a birthday present!?"
He replies, "You didn't use what I got you last year!"
- First girl: I spend hours in front of the mirror admiring my beauty. Do you think that's vanity?
- Second girl: No, it's imagination.
She's so ugly that when a wasp stings her it shuts its eyes.
- Fred: What's that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders?
- Harry: Help! What is it?
- Fred: Your head!
- I'm not ugly. I could marry anyone I pleased!
- But that's the problem - you don't please anyone.
My Mother uses lemon juice for her complexion.
Maybe that is why she always looks so sour.
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Frozen Barbie on a Stick ...in your grocer's frozen food section
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
East German Swim Team Barbie ...a Barbie head on a Ken doll
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Hiroshima Barbie ...just a shadow of her former self
There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Marie Antionette Barbie ...with removable head; guillotine included
