Kids Jokes — most commented jokes

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted. "Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy, of course, thought he did. Leroy's mother, being a religious woman, wanted Leroy to reflect on his behavior over the last year. "Go to your room, Leroy, and think about how you have behaved this year. Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday."

Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

Letter #1:
"Dear God, I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Leroy"

Leroy knew that wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year so he tore up the letter and started over.

Letter #2:
"Dear God, I have been an "OK" boy this year. I still would really like a bike for my birthday. Leroy"

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either. So he wrote a third letter.

Letter #3:
"God, I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday. Please! Thank you, Leroy"

Leroy knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike. By now Leroy was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mom that he wanted to go to church. Leroy's mother thought her plan had worked as Leroy looked very sad. "Just be home in time for dinner", Leroy's mother told him.

Leroy walked down the street to the church on the corner. Little Leroy went into the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. Leroy bent down and picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into the house, and up to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Leroy began to write yet another letter to God.

Letter #4:
"God, I've got your mama. If you want to see her again, send the bike! Signed, YOU KNOW WHO"

One night, a father passed by his son's room and heard his son praying: "God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa."

The father didn't quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured himself that it was just a coincidence, but was still a bit spooked.

The next night, he heard his son praying again: "God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta ta, Grandma."

The father was worried, but decided to wait until morning. Sure enough, the next morning Grandma was on the floor, dead of a heart attack. Really scared now, the father decided to wait outside his son's door the next night. And sure enough, the boy started to pray: "God bless Mommy. Ta ta, Daddy."

Now the father was crapping his pants. He stayed up all night, and went to the doctor's early the next day to make sure his health was fine. When he finally came home, his wife was waiting on the porch. She said, "Thank God you're here -- we could really use your help! We found the milkman dead on our porch this morning!"

- Father: (at hospital looking through glass at newly arrived babies) Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she smiled... isn't she adorable?

- Friend: But your kid didn't smile.

- Father: I was talking about the nurse.

In the maternity ward of a hospital, new-born girl baby looks over at new-born boy baby and asks, "Are you a girl baby or a boy baby?" The boy baby quickly chirps up, "I'm a boy baby!" "How can you tell?" asks girl baby. "Easy," says boy baby. And, with that, he threw off the blankets, hoisted up his itty-bitty night-shirt and proudly pointed downward. "See..... blue booties"

A young boy asked his father, "Dad, do lawyers ever tell the truth?"

The father thought for a moment, "Yes son, sometimes a lawyer will do anything to win a case!"

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Audrey!

- Audrey who?

- Audrey be doing this!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Augusta!

- Augusta who?

- Augusta go home now!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aunt Lou!

- Aunt Lou who?

- Aunt Lou do you think you are!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Ashley!

- Ashley who?

- Ashley-t's foot!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Asia!

- Asia who?

- Asia you going to let me in then!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aries!

- Aries who?

- Aries a reason why I talk this way!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Arizona!

- Arizona who?

- Arizona room for one of us in this town!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Anka!

- Anka who?

- Anka the ship!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Ankansas!

- Ankansas who?

- Ankansas though any piece of wood!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Amory!

- Amory who?

- Amory Christmas and a Happy New Year!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alva!

- Alva who?

- Alva heart!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alvin!

- Alvin who!

- Alvin a great time, how about you?

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Allan!

- Allan who!

- Allan-d of Manhattan!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Allegra!

- Allegra who?

- Allegra is broken!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alma!

- Alma who?

- Alma-ny Knock Knock

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aardvark!

- Aardvark who?

- Aardvark a hundred miles for one of your smiles!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aaron!

- Aaron who!

- Aaron on the side of caution!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Acid!

- Acid who?

- Acid down and be quiet!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Ada!

- Ada who?

- Ada burger for lunch!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Adam!

- Adam who?

- Adam if I do and adam if I don't!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aladdin!

- Aladdin who?

- Aladdin the street wants a word with you!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alba!

- Alba who?

- Alba in the kitchen if you need me!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alexia!

- Alexia who?

- Alexia again to open this door!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alfalfa!

- Alfalfa who?

- Alfalfa you, if you give me a kiss!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Alfie!

- Alfie who?

- Alfie terrible if you leave!