Swallowed Lunch Money
- Mother: Why did you just swallow the money I gave you?
- Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money!
Random joke from this category
- Mother: Why did you just swallow the money I gave you?
- Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money!
A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, "If it weren't for my money, the house wouldn't be here!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money I wouldn't be here."
A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong.
- Ohhh, it's my girlfriend.
- What's the problem?
- When I asked her if she could learn to love me, she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education.
What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?
→ Money's tight these days!
How do thunderstorms invest their money?
→ In a combination of liquid assets and frozen assets
What is the quickest way to double your money?
→ Fold it in half!
Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?
→ Because two halves make a whole (hole), and you could lose your money.
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?
→ Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
What dog has money?
→ A bloodhound, because he is always picking up scents (cents).
If George Washington were alive today, why couldn't he throw a silver dollar across the Potomac?
→ Because a dollar doesn't go as far as it used to.