School — most commented jokes

What did the Gorilla do with the apple he was holding in his hands?
→ He brought it to school and said, 'An Ape-lle for the teacher!'

Two girls were having their packed lunch in the school yard. One had an apple and the other said, 'Watch out for worms won't you!'
The first one replied, 'why should I? They can watch out for themselves.'

School lunches are not generally popular with those that have to eat them, and sometimes with good reason.
"What kind of pie do you call this?" asked one schoolboy indignantly.
"What's it taste of?" asked the cook.
"Glue!"
"Then it's apple pie, the plum pie tastes of soap."

What kind of ants are very learned?
→ Pedants!

What do you call an ant who skips school?
→ A truant!

Why do computer teachers never get sick?
→ Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

- Teacher: Shall I put the school computer on?

- Pupil: No, Miss, the dress you're wearing looks fine.

- Teacher: Look at the state of the school computer. I want that screen cleaned so I can see my face in it!

- Pupil: But then it will crack and we won't be able to use it at all.

- Pupil: In other schools, pupils get a choice of computers to use.

- Teacher: You get a choice her, too. Use the one we've got or don't use any at all.

- Student: Would it be possible to install Arabic language support on those computers?

- Computer Teacher: In order to use Arabic language in Windows, you must install an Arabic graphic card. So I don't think we could do that.