Animal Jokes — most commented jokes

Why was the skunk arrested for counterfeiting?
→ Because he gave out bad scents (cents).

Where do hogs keep their money?
→ In piggy banks.

Why is a cat like a penny?
→ Because it has a head on one side and a tail on the other.

When does a female deer need money?
→ When she doesn't have a buck.

What happened when Dumbo went to a mind reader?
→ They gave him his money back.

Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money.

- I'm not paying - said the duck.

- I've only got one bill and I'm not breaking it.

- I've spent my last buck - said the deer.

- Then the duck'll have to pay - said the skunk.

- Getting here cost me my last scent.

What happened when the cat swallowed a coin?
→ There was money in the kitty.

Where do bees keep their money?
→ In a honey box.

What is Iraq's national bird?
→ Duck

A destroyer pulled into a foreign port, and put down maximum liberty. The skeleton crew didn't notice a chimpanzee, escaped from a nearby civilian transport, crawled up the ropes and up to the smokestack. Down the stack, it made its way into the engine room. It came across a power panel opened up for maintenance, couldn't read the warning signs, and with a bright blue blast shorted out the ship's electrical system, and plunged the ship into darkness.

A little bit later, two junior Hull Technicians wander down with their flashlights, looking for the problem. They come upon the blackened body of the chimp. They shine their flashlights on its long, burnt arms.
They look at each other. They highlight its short legs and odd feet. They look at each other. Finally one says:

- Well, it's too hairy to be an Electrician, the legs are too short for a Hull Tech, and there would be more tatoos on a Bo'sun. Call the wardroom, see if one of the duty officers is missing.