Animal Jokes — most commented jokes

What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle?
→ Wheeeee!!!!!

One day Mullah was beating his donkey in a remote place. A man saw him and asked: why are you beating the poor animal. Sorry, said Mullah, is it a member of your family?

Mama bear to Papa bear:
"Well... You might call it hibernating -- I call it 'goofing off'."

A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.
He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.

Exasperated dragon on the field of battle:
"Mother said there would be knights like this."

What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
→ Elkaseltzer.

Turtle to turtle: "Don't ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?"

Why don't lobsters share?
→ They're shellfish.

What did the emu say to the nurse?
→ Mend her bones or walk the plank

Why did Mrs. Smokey the Bear divorce Smokey the Bear?
→ Because every time she got hot, he'd beat her with a shovel!