Doctor Jokes — most commented jokes

- Camp Doctor: Your cough sounds better today!

- Camper: It should, I practised all night!

Jack went to see the camp nurse. 'I fell last night,' he said. 'And I was unconscious for eight hours.'
The nurse was shocked. 'How awful. What happened?'
'I fell asleep!'

- Nurse: Would you like an appointment for next week?

- Patient: No, I'm sick now.

- Doctor, Doctor, I keep dreaming of bats, creepy-crawlies, demons, ghosts, monsters, vampires, werewolves and yetis.

- Doctor: How interesting. Do you always dream in alphabetical order?

A man who was very upset walked in to see his doctor. "Doctor, you've got to help me!" he wailed.
"What seems to be the trouble?" asked the doctor. "I keep having the same dream, night after night. There's this door with a sign on it, and I push and push the door but I can't get it open."
"What does the sign say?" asked the Doctor. "Pull," said the patient.

"What do you do?" a young man asked the beautiful girl he was dancing with. "I'm a nurse." "I wish I could be ill and let you nurse me," he whispered in her ear. "That would be miraculous. I work on the maternity ward."

"Why are you so excited?" the surgeon asked the patient that was about to be anesthetized.
"But doc, this is my first operation."
"Really? It's mine too, and I am not excited at all."

How many physiotherapists does it take to change a light bulb?
→ None. They just give the dead bulb some exercises to do and hope it will be working a bit better the next time they see it.

At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other. The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. As they sit down at the restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands.

After dinner, one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel bedroom.
Just as things get hot, the female doctor interrupts and says she has to go and wash her hands. Once she comes back they go for it.
After the sex session, she gets up and says she is going to wash her hands.

As she comes back the male doctor says, "I bet you are a surgeon".
She confirms and asks how he knew.
"Easy, you're always washing your hands."
She then says, "I bet you're an anesthesiologist."

- Male doctor: Wow, how did you guess?

- Female doctor: I didn't feel a thing.

What is a double-blind study?
→ Two orthopaedists reading an electrocardiogram.