Dirty Jokes — most commented jokes

Have you heard about the new Mechanical Whore?
→ She gives a licking and keeps on ticking.

What's the difference between "ooh" and "aah?"
→ About three inches.

Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick are perched near the front door of the girls' dorm. Several plain Janes walk by as the two converse.

Then a Sharon Stone look-alike emerges from the dorm and saunters past. Romeo turns, smiles, and -- barely audibly -- inquires:

- Tickle your ass with a feather?

The young beauty -- startled by what she thinks she heard -- exclaims:

- What?!

Without missing a beat, Romeo repeats:

- Typical nasty weather?

- Oh - she demures.

- Yes - and goes on her way.

More young lovelies walk by and the scene is repeated.

- Tickle your ass with a feather?

- What?

- Typical nasty weather?

Finally, Romeo delivers his line:

- Tickle your ass with a feather? and his prospect stops, smiles and invites him up to her room.

Now the sidekick, alone, having paid close attention, decides to try this remarkable new technique. A likely prospect comes near. The sidekick leers and blurts out:

- Cram a feather up your ass?

Shocked, the girl spins around and slaps him, to which he replies:

- Looks like rain!

A girl gets a tattoo of Santa Claus on one thigh and a turkey on the other. She wants to show that there is something good to eat in between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

What's the difference between true love and herpes?
→ Herpes lasts forever.

So one sperm says to the other:

- When do we get to the ovaries?

The other replies:

- Ovaries! We're not even past the throat yet!

A man, being on top of a woman, says after a while:

- Honey, your tits are too small, and your box is too tight.

- Get off my back, dear! - she replies.

What's another term for cunnilingus?
→ Genital Slurpees.

Mongo's old lady decided she wanted to do something special to please him on his birthday, so she bought a pair of crotchless panties. That night, as he came into the house, she lay sprawled on the couch spread-eagle.

- Hi hon - she purred sexily.

- Y'all want some of this?

- Hell, no! - he hollered.

- Look at what it's done to your undies!

A Ken and Barbie Joke: Why does Barbie never get pregnant?
→ Because Ken always comes in a box!