Random joke from this category
What's the definition of a perfect woman?
a) Three feet tall with a round hole for a mouth and a flat head so that you can put a pint of beer on it.
b) The sports model has pullback ears and her teeth fold in.
c) The economy model fucks all night and at midnight turn into a roastbeef sandwich and a sixpack.
The modest young lass had just purchased some lingerie and asked if she might have the sentence, "If you can read this you're too damn close" embroidered on her panties and bra. "Yes Madame," said the clerk. "I'm quite certain that could be done. Would you prefer block or script letters?" "Braille," she replied.
What do cow pies and cowgirls have in common?
→ The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
This blind guy was walking pass the fish market and he said "Good morning ladies.."
These two women went out for a night on the town and got just totally sloshed. At the end of the evening they decided to take a short cut through a cow pasture after being unable to find a ride home. They became lost so split up to try and find the road home. One of the lushes doubled back only to stumble on the other flat on her back sucking on, and playing with a cow's udders. Her friend screamed "what are you doing"? the other lush says "shut up, with all these guys here someone'll drive us home".
Three Things Women Can Do That Men Can't:
Woman goes into a hardware store and asks the clerk for two AA batteries. The clerk gestures with his fingers and says, "Come this way," and heads towards the back of the store.
- If I could come that way - she tells the retreating clerk:
- I wouldn't need the batteries.
Who makes all the bras for brunettes?
→ Fisher-Price
The success of the "Wonder Bra" for under-endowed women, has encouraged the designers to come out with a bra for over-endowed women.
It's called the "Sheep Dog Bra"...
It rounds them up and points them in the right direction.
Commercial:
Do Seagulls Circle your house?
Does your boyfriend sing " The shrimp boats are coming"?
Do you make people vomit in the elevator?
Try FDS!
Feminnine hygene spray! two squirts will 'twinkle your twat'
