Random joke from this category
A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it. Fifty people swindled! Fifty people swindled!"
Curious, a man walked over, bought a paper, and checked the front page. Finding nothing, the man said, "There's nothing in here about fifty people being swindled."
The newsboy ignored him and went on, calling out, "Read all about it. Fifty-one people swindled!"
An Illinois man pretending to have a gun kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines. The kidnapper then proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
Izzard went into a Baltimore bank to cash his check. Since he didn't have an account there, the teller asked if he could identify himself.
"Sure," said Izzard.
"There a mirror around here?"
"There's one on the wall right beside you," said the clerk.
Izzard took a glance in the mirror and heaved a sigh of relief.
"Yep!" he said. "It's me, all right!"
Zack and Tybe, two Alabama farm boys, bought themselves a truckload of watermelons for a buck apiece.
They sold each one for a dollar. After counting up their cash, they realized they'd wound up with the same amount of money they'd started out with.
"See!" said Tybe. "Ah told yew we shoulda got a bigger truck!"
- IRS Agent: What's all this?
- Bracken: Well, you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson, Tammy Wynette, and Garth Brooks . . .
Did you hear about the Georgia accountant who absconded with all the accounts payable?
- Housekeeper: Professor, there's a bill collector at the door. I told him you were out. But he wouldn't believe me.
- Professor: No? Then I suppose I'll have to go and tell him myself.
Why did the idiot plant nickels in his garden?
→ He wanted to raise some hard cash.
How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb?
→ Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
If you need a loan, who do you see in the bank?
→ The Loan Arranger (Lone Ranger).
