Guest
Hissing Cat Fight Loser
What do you call the loser in a hissing, scratching cat fight?
→ Claude
Animal Jokes — most commented jokes
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Random joke from this category
Guest
Car And Pet
What do you get when you put a car and a pet together?
→ Carpet!
Arrested Pig
What do you call a pig who's been arrested for dangerous driving?
→ A road hog!
Guest
Windscreen Snakes
Which snakes are found on cars?
→ Windscreen vipers.
Guest
Frog's Broken Car
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
→ It gets toad away.
Guest
Insects' Car
What car do insects drive?
→ A Volkswagen automobile.
Guest
Howling Dog
How do you stop a dog howling in the back of a car?
→ Put him in the front.
Guest
Truck Full Of Canaries
A fellow was following a truck in heavy traffic. Every block or so, when they were stopped at a stop light, the driver of the truck would jump out of the cab with a big stick and bang on the side of the cargo bay. He'd then jump back into the cab in time to drive away when the signal changed.
The first fellow observed this for several miles, until he could stand it no longer. The next time the truck driver jumped out with the stick, the first fellow jumped out and ran up to him.
- I'm sorry to bother you - he said, over the din of the banging
- but I am very curious; could you tell me what you are doing?
Without breaking rhythm, the truck driver replied:
- Sure, Mac. Ya see, this here's a six-ton truck but I've got eight tons of canaries aboard, so I've gotta keep two ton of them flying all the time so I don't break an axle.
Guest
King Kong's Business
What business is King Kong in?
→ Monkey business.
Guest
Three Parrots
This guy is selling three parrots. Another guy who wants to buy a parrot approaches him and asks:
- How much are your parrots?
The salesman answers:
- The first one is $1,000.
- What does he know?
- He knows 10,000 words and 500 sentences and is able to solve mathematical expressions.
- How about the second one?
- The second parrot costs $5,000.
- What does he know?
- He knows 100,000 words and 10,000 sentences, is able to solve mathematical expressions, and create computer programs.
- Then what is the price for the third one? - the buyer is wondering.
- This one costs $20,000.
- Really?! - wonders the excited buyer.
- What does he know?
- This one knows absolutely nothing, but the two others always call him 'THEIR BOSS.'