Most commented jokes

What do you get when you play a new age song backwards?
→ A new age song.

A musician calls the orchestra office, asks for the conductor, and is told that he is dead.

The musician calls back 25 times more and gets the same message from receptionist.

She asks why he keeps calling. He replies:

- I just like to hear you say it.

Why are conductors' hearts popular for transplants?
→ They've had little use.

What do you do with percussionists that lose one of their drumsticks?
→ Stick them up front of the group and tell them to wave their arms!

What is the definition of a Soviet String Quartet?
→ A Soviet Symphony Orchestra after a tour of the USA!

When a young hotshot conductor was making his debut at the Met, he showed the jaded and skeptical orchestra how well he knew the music by singing all parts of the Lucia sextet during rehearsal.

Afterwards, one musician was overheard whispering to the other, impressed:

- Well, this kid really knows his stuff!

The other replied:

- I don't think he is so hot. Did you notice how flat his high E was at the end?

- Mom, why do you always stand by the window when I practice for my singing lessons?

- I don't want the neighbours to think I'm employing corporal punishment, dear.

- Dad, why do the singers rock left and right while performing on stage?

- Because, son, it is more difficult to hit a moving target.

- It must be terrible for an opera singer to realize that he can never sing again.

- Yes, but it's much more terrible if he doesn't realize it.

How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid?
→ When the other tenors notice.