Most commented jokes

If the bird of wisdom is an owl, and the bird of peace is the dove, what is the bird of TRUE love?
→ The Swallow.

A REDNECK BRINGS HIS DAUGHTER TO THE GYNOCOLOGIST FOR BIRTH CONTROL PILLS.

THE DR. ASKS:

- IS YOUR DAUGHTER SEXUALLY ACTIVE?

THE REDNECK SAYS:

- NAW, SHE JUST LAYS THERE LIKE HER MOTHER.

Down in Florida, two widows were talking and one asked the other:

- Do you ever get to feeling horny?

- Yes - her friend replied.

- What do you do about it?

- I usually suck on a Lifesaver.

After a moment of stunned silence her friend asked:

- Well, what beach do you go to?

How is sex like air?
→ It's no big thing unless you aren't getting any.

How can ya tell when a woman has fucked too much?

Ya put yer thumb in her ass, AND yer middle-finger in her cunt...

Now, if ya can SNAP yer fingers, ya know she's been fucking too much..

What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
→ A tea bag.

A nun is walking down a deserted road when a man grabs her and starts raping her. After the rapist is done, he says:

- Hey Sister, what are you going to tell the other Sisters now?

- I'll tell them the truth, that you grabbed me, threw me to the ground, and raped me twice....unless you're tired. - she responded.

Do you know what a Yankee is?
→ Same as a quickie, except you're by yourself

Little Freddie said to Little Johnny:

- My dad's tougher than your dad!

- Oh yeah? - said Little Johnny.

- My dad is so tough, he has lightbulbs for dinner!

- Really?

- Yeah, the other night I heard him tell my mom:

- Turn out the light, I wanna eat it!

A guy's fingering his girlfriend.

She says:

- Would you take off your ring? It's hurting me.

He says:

- That's not my ring...

- It's my wristwatch.