Clean Jokes

Why did the girl take a ruler to bed?
→ She wanted to see how long she slept.

Why did your sister keep running around her bed?
→ Because she was trying to catch up with her sleep.

Why does your brother wear a life jacket in bed?
→ Because he sleeps on a waterbed!

Why did the bed spread?
→ Because it saw the pillow slip.

Shall I tell you the joke about the bed?
→ No, because it hasn't been made up yet.

Why do people go to bed?
→ Because the bed won't come to them.

Why did the girl put her bed in the fireplace?
→ Because she wanted to sleep like a log.

How can you shorten a bed?
→ Don't sleep long in it.

- I'd like to buy a bed, please.

- Certainly, madam. Spring mattress?

- Oh, no! I want to be able to use it all year.

What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on?
→ Cot-on-wool.