Clean Jokes

Did you hear about the lady whose house was infested with Easter eggs?
→ She had to call an eggs-terminator!

Why did the internit paint his computer screen in little black and white squares?
→ He wanted to check his e-mail.

- Doctor Doctor I swallowed a bone.

- Are you choking?

- No, I really did!

What's green and purple and goes up and down?
→ Barney in an elevator.

How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow?
→ Down in the mouth!

What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?
→ Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

Why doesn't the dinosaur cross the road anymore?
→ Because their eggs stink. (They're extinct)

- Teacher: When do astronauts eat?

- Pupil: At launch time!

Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
→ They both drop their needles!

Why were ancient Egyptian children confused?
→ Because their daddies were mummies.