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What do you get if you cross a snake and a hotdog?
→ A fangfurter!

What should you do if you find a snake sleeping in your bed?
→ Sleep in the wardrobe!

What's a snakes favourite dance?
→ Snake, rattle & roll!

Why can't you trust snakes?
→ They speak with forked tongues!

Have you heard about the slippery eel?
→ Didn't think so, you wouldn't be able to grasp it!

What do you call a snake that is trying to become a bird?
→ A feather boa!

What do you get if you cross a trumpet and a serpent?
→ A snake in the brass!

What is a snakes favourite opera?
→ Wriggletto!

Which hand would you use to pick up a dangerous snake?
→ Someone else's!

What snakes are good at sums?
→ Adders!

What's a snakes favourite TV program?
→ Monty Python!

What do you get if you cross a snake and a pig?
→ A boar constrictor!

What is another word for a python?
→ A mega-bite!

What did the snake say when offered a piece of cheese?
→ Thanks, I'll just have a sliver!

Why wouldn't the snake go on the weighing maching?
→ Because he had his own scales!

What's a snake's favourite food?
→ Hiss Cakes!

What do you get if you cross a snake and a lego set?
→ A boa constructor!

Why did the jellybean go to school?
→ Because he wanted to be a smarty

What did one math book say to the other?
→ Man I got a lot of problems!

- Teacher: Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?

- Johnny: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.

- Teacher: What is the formula for water?

- George: H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O

- Teacher: Is that the formula I gave you?

- George: Sure, you said H to O!

- Caspar: I was the teacher's pet last year.

- Jaspar: Why was that?

- Caspar: She couldn't afford a dog.

- Science teacher: What happened when electricity was first discovered?

- Fred: Someone got a nasty shock.

- Principal: Do you do your homework?

- Kid: Now & Then

- Principal: Where do you do it?

- Kid: Here & There

- Principal: Put him in the closet!!!

- Kid: Hey, When will I get out?

- Principal: Oh, sooner or later

- Mother: Why are you home from school so early?

- Son: I was the only one who could answer a question.

- Mother: Oh, really? What was the question?

- Son: Who threw the eraser at the principal?