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Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
→ He was feeling crummy!

What do you call cheese that's not yours?
→ Nacho cheese!

What's a doll's favorite food?
→ Barbie-Q!

What do you call an egg from outer space?
→ An unidentified flying omelet!

What do you call a fake noodle?
→ An Impasta.

What did one strawberry say to the other?
→ Look at the jam you've gotten us into!

Did you hear about the two peanuts walking in the woods?
→ One was "a-salted."

What's a fresh vegetable?
→ One that insults a farmer.

What vegetable needs a plumber?
→ A leek.

- Would you like a duck egg for supper?

- Only if you quack it for me.

- Do you feel like a glass of carrot juice?

- Why? Do I look like one?

Several women were discussing what they should have for dinner. "If you're watching your weight," came one suggestion, "those diet frozen dinners are good." The man then added: "But get two. They're small."

What can you make from baked beans and onions?
→ Tear gas.

- Wife: You look tired, honey. How about a nice steak, mashed potatoes and an apple pie for dessert?

- Husband: No thanks. I'm too tired. Let's just eat at home.

- Wife: The 2 things I cook best are meatloaf and apple pie.

- Husband: Which is this?

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Butter!

- Butter who?

- Butter wrap up - it's cold out here!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Beef!

- Beef who?

- Beef fair now!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bean!

- Bean who?

- Bean working very hard today!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bacon!

- Bacon who?

- Bacon a cake for your birthday!

What do you get if you cross an alien and a hot drink?
→ Gravi-tea!

If there were no food left, what could people do?
→ Country people could eat their forest preserves and city people could have their traffic jams.

What could you do if you were on a desert island without food or water?
→ Open your watch: drink from the spring, and eat the sand which is (sandwiches) there.

How can you make a soup rich?
→ Add 14 carrots (carats) to it.

Why are oranges like bells?
→ You can peel (peal) both of them.

What food is good for the brain?
→ Noodle soup.