Pierre was a camper from France. In his honour, Jenny sang a French song in the talent show. But she didn't sing very well.
- Does that make you homesick? - someone asked Pierre.
- No - he answered.
- Just sick sick!
Meg's mother was visiting her daughter at camp.
- How did you find the steak dinner? - she asked.
- With a magnifying glass!
Steve wrote home.
- I'm glad you named me Steve - he said in the letter.
- Why? - asked his mother in her reply.
- Because that's what all the kids at camp call me - he wrote back.
- Sammy: My parents are sending me to camp.
- Tammy: Why? Do you need a vacation?
- Sammy: No. They do!
One day the counsellor got a phone call. It was from a camper who had been at camp the summer before.
The old camper said:
- I thought of camp yesterday.
- Why? - the counsellor asked.
- Where were you?
- At the garbage dump! - the old camper answered.
On the last day of camp everyone was asked the same question:
- What is the best part of the camp?
One wise guy answered:
- Going home!
- New camper: I thought you said this camp has no mosquitoes.
- Old camper: That's right. These mosquitoes come from the camp down the road!
At the end of camp, Julie won the prize for neatest trunk. Her mother was amazed.
- How did your trunk get so neat? - she asked her messy daughter.
- It was easy - said Julie.
- I just never unpacked!
The head Counselor gathered all the campers together. To get their attention, the Counselor called out:
- Order! Order!
In a flash someone shouted out:
- Hamburger, coke and fries!
The Counselor was talking to the campers about safety.
She said:
- Don't climb any trees. If you fall down and break a leg, don't come running to me!
The Counselor was greeting the new campers.
- So you decided to come to camp - she said to one.
- Nope - the camper answered.
- I was sent to camp!
- Camper: There's a leak over my bunk!
- Counselor: That's what we said in the camp ads. Running water in every cabin!
- Camper: There's a leak over my bunk!
- Counselor: Shh! Don't make such a fuss. Soon everyone will want one.
- Camper: There's a leak over my bunk!
- Counselor: Don't complain. It only leaks when it rains.
A Counselor saw a camper sitting alone.
- Why don't you play with your friends? - he asked.
- Because I only have one friend - the girl replied.
- And I hate her.
What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?
→ "I love you a ton!"
What would you get if you crossed a monster with the god of love?
→ A stupid Cupid!
What happened when the monster kissed his one true love?
→ He left lip prints on the mirror!
What did one bell say to the other?
→ "Be my valenchime!"
Why did the kangaroo love the little Australian bear?
→ Because the bear had many fine koala-ties!
Did you hear the one about the phoney Cupid?
→ He was totally bow-gus!
What is the most romantic city in England?
→ Loverpool!
What do you call two birds in love?
→ Tweethearts!
- Do you love me more than you love sleep?
- I can't answer now. It's time for my nap!
What does a man who loves his car do on February 14?
→ He gives it a valenshine!
