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What's the difference between a horse and the weather?
→ One is reined up and the other rains down.

What did the hurricane say to the other hurricane?
→ I have my eye on you.

What did the thermometer say to the other thermometer?
→ You make my temperature rise.

What's the difference between 'weather' and 'climate'?
→ You can't 'weather' a tree, but you can 'climate'!

What did one tornado say to the other?
→ "Let's twist again, like we did last summer...."

Two weathermen each broke an arm and a leg in an accident, and called from the hospital about the four casts.

There is a Shreveport cable TV channel that broadcasts the (live) video of the Shreveport radar and the audio of the NOAA weather radio station. When explaining why he knew he should go into meteorology, he said that when he was young, he would sometimes watch the channel even when there were no echoes, just for fun.

Recently during the heavy rains they have experienced in New England the mail carrier for one neighborhood commeneted on the "pouring rain." Well, atleast the dew point is coming down!

During the month of June and July. Here in the panhandle it got pretty hot in this area. In Fact people were even overworking in the heat. So one day I was working outside in the heat and then i thought i better get inside. My Boss asked me where i was going and i told him i am going inside to cool down.
He said that i better get back to work. I said i cant, he said how come.? Because it is so hot out here that i have to go inside to change my mind.

Years ago, Nebraskans got tired of leaning into the wind, having their top soil blown away, and chickens laying their eggs two and three times. Seems the wind continually came down from Canada, and there was nothing between Canada and Nebraska to stop it.
The farmers all got together and decided to build a fence across the North Border of the State of Nebraska. . . . the idea being, to stop that cold wind. It might've worked, too. The barbed wire they used was strong enough, but the real problem was that a couple owners of farms on the upper boarder kept leaving their gates open.

If you are standing in the main street of Amsterdam, and can't see the clock tower of the Central Railway Station, that means it is raining. If you can see the clock tower, that means it is about to rain.

How do you spot a happy motorcyclist in fair weather?
→ He's got bugs on his teeth.

The Michaels family owned a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for generations. Mrs. Michaels, who had just celebrated her ninetieth birthday, lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren.

One day, her son came into her room holding a letter. "I just got some news, Mom," he said. "The government has come to an agreement with the people in Washington. They've decided that our land is really part of the United States. We have the right to approve or disapprove of the agreement. What do you think?"

"What do I think?" his mother said. "Jump at it! Call them right now…

Where did the meteorologist stop for a drink on the way home from a long day in the studio?
→ The nearest ISOBAR!!

Out in Kansas, tornadoes often hit with sudden devastation, and without warning. In one case, a house was completely whisked away, leaving only the foundation and first floor. A silver-haired farm lady was seen sitting dazed, in a bathtub, the only remaining part of the house left above the floor. The rescue squad rushed to her aid and found her unhurt. She was just sitting there in the tub, talking to herself.
"It was the most amazing thing ... it was the most amazing thing." she kept repeating dazedly.

"What was the most amazing thing, Ma'am?" asked one of the rescuers.
"I was visiting my daughter here, taking a bath, and all I did was pull the plug and dog-gone-it if the whole house didn't…

Why were the vets and pounds mad?
→ It was raining cats and dogs

What do freezing rain and cake icing have in common?
→ Both are a glaze

Which weather features do druggies like most?
→ Highs

Why is the sky not happy on clear days?
→ It has the blues

How does a male lightning bolt feel when he notices an attractive female lightning bolt?
→ Thunderstruck

What type of wind is named after a young deer?
→ Foehn

What type of wind is named after Santa Claus's warm climate cousin?
→ Santa Ana

What type of wind is named after both a cat and a bat?
→ Katabatic

How can you tell if a tornado is stupid?
→ If it spins anti-cyclonically

What cloud is so lazy because it will not get up?
→ Fog