Computer Jokes

- You're a big internet fan, arn't you?

- Yes, I really get a buzz out of it!

- You're a big Internet fan aren't you?

- Yes - it's becoming a habit!

- Why do you think your report should be on the net?

- Because my marks are all 'E's.

Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet?
→ Because they can't stop saving their work.

Where does the Internet football team play?
→ Webley.

What do you call someone who spends 24 hours a day on the Internet?
→ Anything you like, they're not listening to you anyway.

- Teacher: What are the four elements?

- Pupil: Fire, Earth, Water and the Internet.

- Teacher: What do you mean the Internet?

- Pupil: Well, Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net, I'm in my element.

- Teacher: Don't forget to check the Internet if you have trouble with your homework questions.

- Pupil: It's not the questions I have trouble with, it's the answers.

- So what exactly can I learn on the Internet?

- Anything you like - it can even teach you to talk like an Indian.

- How?

- See? It's working already.

- Since you've discovered the Internet, you don't pay any attention to me!

- Who said that?