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When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?
→ When the chips are down!

What system do they teach in Hamburger High's math courses?
→ The meatric system, silly!

What song do burgers sing on the job?
→ Gristle While You Work!

What old-time song is the burgers' favourite?
→ 'Hammy' - as sung by Al Jolson!

What kind of girl does a hamburger like?
→ Any girl named Patty!

What kind of company is a 24 hours hamburger joint?
→ Fry-by-night!

What kind of baseball do burgers play?
→ Ketchup baseball!

What kind of a pitch did Sandy Koufax of the old Burger-lyn Dodgers have?
→ A fastball - a sizzler.

What is the hamburgers' motto?
→ If at first you don't succeed, fry, fry again!

What is the hamburgers' most familiar song?
→ 'Home on the Range'!

What is a hamburger's favourite story?
→ Hansel and Gristle!

What happens when two burgers fall in love?
→ They live together in holy meatrimony!

What great song is associated with hamburgers and baseball?
→ 'Steak Me Out to the Ballgame'!

What famous movie did the hamburger meat think of when they took it out of the freezer?
→ They Fry Who Cam in from the Cold!

What do you use to determine if a refrigerated burger is cold enough?
→ A thermomeater!

What do they say about the noise at the Burger Land Super Bowl?
→ It's PAN-demonium!

What do they call a meeting among the most brilliant people in Burger Land?
→ A MEATing of the minds!

What do some people have against cheeseburgers?
→ They say:

- Burgers can't be cheesy!

What do some burger eaters have?
→ A Hardee appetite!

What do hamburger workers say on Monday morning?
→ Well, it's back to the old grind!

What do burgers think when they are surrounded by gherkins?
→ They think they are in a pickle.

What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army?
→ You've got no beef, soldier!

What did they say about the burger who went skiing for the first time?
→ How the meaty have fallen!

What did they do to the burger who thought he was a rooster?
→ Cook-a-doodle-do!

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?
→ Rink injustice!