Queen Bee's Travels
How does a queen bee get around her hive?
→ She's throne!
How does a queen bee get around her hive?
→ She's throne!
What's black, yellow and covered in blackberries?
→ A bramble bee!
What's more dangerous than being with a fool?
→ Fooling with a bee!
Why did the bee started talking poetry?
→ He was waxing lyrical!
Who writes books for little bees?
→ Bee-trix Potter!
What did the bee say to the naughty bee?
→ Bee-hive yourself!
What is the difference between an elephant and a flea?
→ An elephant can have fleas but a flea can't have elephants!
One woodworm met another.
- How's life? - she asked.
- Oh, same as usual - he replied, boring.
What do you get when you cross a bell with a bee?
→ A humdinger.
What happened to the man who turned into an insect?
→ He just beetled off!
What did one flea say to the other flea when they came out of the movies?
→ Should we walk home or take a dog?
- First Caribou: What do you call a bee that can't make up his mind?
- Second Caribou: A maybee.
What's a bee-line?
→ The shortest distance between two buzz-stops!
An idiot decided to start a chicken farm, so he bought a hundred chickens to start. A month later, he returned to the dealer for another hundred chickens because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back at the dealers for another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died. "But I think I know where I'm going wrong," said the idiot. "I think I am planting them too deep."
There were two guys working for the city. One would dig a hole -- he would dig, dig, dig.
The other would come behind him and fill the hole -- fill, fill, fill.
These two men worked furiously; one digging a hole, the other filling it up again.
A man was watching from the sidewalk and couldn't believe how hard these men were working, but couldn't understand what they were doing.
Finally he had to ask them.
He said to the hole digger:
- I appreciate how hard you work, but what are you doing? You dig a hole and your partner comes behind you and fills it up again!
The hole digger replied:
- Oh yeah, must look funny, but the guy who plants the trees is sick today.
One idiot said to the other, "You know, there are really only three kinds of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't."
What is the biggest ant in the world?
→ An elephant!
What lives in gum trees?
→ Stick insects!
What has four wheels and flies?
→ A rubbish bin!
What kind of suit does a bee wear to work?
→ A buzzness suit!
What do you call a bee who's had a spell put on him?
→ He's bee-witched!
What did the idiot do to the flea in his ear?
→ Shot it!
Why does the town idiot take his bedroom door off the hinges and put it to the sid every night when he goes to sleep?
→ Because he's afraid someone would look through the keyhole.
Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says:
- I want four budgies.
- Salesman: Certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female?
- Newfie: I don't care. I just want 4 budgies!
- Salesman: Certainly sir, what color would you like? We have yellow, blue, gr...
- Newfie: I don't care what color they are, just put four budgies in a box for me. Is that too hard?
- Salesman: O.K. O.K.
The two newfies pay for the budgies and leave. They drive out to this high cliff in Newfoundland and the first newfie reaches in the box and pulls out two of the birds, grasps them firmly and jumps off the cliff while flapping his arms. Of course he SPLATS at the bottom.
Have you heard about the Irish abortion clinic?
→ There's a 12-month waiting list.