Political Jokes

How can you tell Bill Clinton from a bunch of dead bodies?
→ He's the stiff one.

Who was the most powerful cat in China?
→ Chairman Miaow!

Two government economists were returning home from a field meeting. As with all government travelers, they were assigned the cheapest seats on the plane so they each were occupying the center seat on opposite sides of the aisle.

They continued their discussion of the knotty problem that had been the subject of their meeting through takeoff and meal service until finally one of the passengers in an aisle seat offered to trade places so they could talk and he could sleep.

After switching seats, one economist remarked to the other that it was the first time an economic discussion ever kept anyone awake.

Why is President Carter important to Hamburger Land in April?
→ One the opening day of the baseball season, he throws out the first meatball!

Which political discussions between the Russians and Americans keenly interest Burger Land citizens?
→ The SALT talks!

What can you say about Ham Burger and Chief Justice Warren Burger?
→ Ham Burger is 'well done' and Chief Justice Warren Burger has 'done well'!

Why is politics for the birds?
→ Because politicians always parrot the same old lines!

Which bird ran for President?
→ H. Ross Parrot

What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock?
→ Politics

An 8th grade boy was doing some research for his career report at school. He asks his dad, "Father, how many wildlife biologists work for the Federal Government?"

The honest father replies, "Oh, I would say at least half of 'em."