Men Jokes

Men are like power tools.
They make a lot of noise, but it's hard to get them to work.

Men are like chocolate bars.
Sweet, smooth and they usually head right for your hips.

Men are like coolers.
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like computers.
Hard to figure out and never enough memory.

Men are like coffee.
The best ones are rich, hot and can keep you up all night.

What are the three types of men?
→ The handsome, the caring, and the majority.

Why do men float better than women?
→ Because they are scum.

Why is it dangerous to let your man's mind wander?
→ It's too little to be out alone.

How are men like television commercials?
→ You can't believe a word either one of them says, and they both last about 30 seconds.

One Saturday afternoon, a man was sitting in his lawn chair drinking beer and watching his wife mow the lawn. A neighbor lady was so outraged at this, she came over and shouted at the man, "You should be hung!" To which he calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass!"