Instrument Jokes

How do you make a bandstand?
→ Take away their chairs

A saxophone is like a lawsuit.
Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

- Hey buddy. How late does the band play?

- About half a beat behind the drummer.

Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: "Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"

- My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three o'clock this morning!

- Did they wake you?

- Nah.... I was up playing my bagpipes.

A down and out musician was playing his harmonica in the middle of a busy shopping mall. Striding over, a policeman asked, "May I please see your permit?"

"I don't have one," confessed the musician.

"In that case, you'll have to accompany me."

"Splendid!" exclaimed the musician. "What shall we sing?"

One day the bass player hid one of the drummer's sticks.
The drummer said, "finally! After being a drummer for so long, now I am a conductor!"

Why did the boy bring a ladder to chorus?
→ He wanted to sing higher!

What do you get if you cross a lamp with a violin?
→ You get light music.

- Do you think, Professor, that my wife should take up the piano as a career?

- No, I think she should put down the lid as a favor.