Celebrities

Arnold Swartzeneger and Sylvester Stallone are making a movie about the lives of the great composers. Stallone says "I want to be Mozart." Swartzeneger says: "In that case... I'll be Bach."

What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address?
→ Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.

What did Michael Jackson say when his cock slid in the little boys arse?
→ There is a great musician in you.

Why can't the government put Magic Johnson on a stamp?
→ Everyone would be afraid to lick it.

What's stiff and excites women?
→ Elvis Presley.

What's got 400 legs and no pubic hair?
→ The front row of a Hanson concert

Stick your tongue out.

Move it up and down.

Relax.

Now move it left and right.

Well done! You have now completed Christopher Reeves workout video.

The McCartney kids are at the family ranch anxiously awaiting news of their mother. Paul emerges from his wife's bedroom. "Kid's......there's good news and bad news." "The bad news is your mother's strength and will to live has been sucked away by her awful disease and she died a few moments ago" "The good news is.... It's steak and chips for dinner!"

What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson's dreams every night??
→ Hansons.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
→ One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with.... the other is used to carry groceries.