Blonde Jokes

How do you kill a blonde?
→ Give them a gun an say it is a blow dryer

Did you hear why they closed the Seattle Kingdom?

While the crowd was doing the wave, two blondes drowned.

A blonde came home from school one day and said to her mom, "I can count higher then all the kids in my second grade class, do you think it is because I am a blonde?"

Her mother replied, "Of couse it is, dear."

The next day, the blonde said, "I can say the alphabet higher then anyone in my class, do you think it is because I am a blonde?"

Her mother replied, "Of course it is dear!"

The next day the blonde came home from her gymnastics and asked her mother, "I have a larger chest then all the kids in my class, do you think its because I am a blonde?"

Her mother replied, "No dear, I think it is because you are eighteen years old."

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead and one's a blonde.

The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!" Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.

The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!" Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.

By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" and the blonde yells, "FIRE!!!"

Why do blondes wear their hair up?
→ To catch everything that goes over their heads

What did the blonde think of the new computer?
→ She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9.

Why don't blondes eat Jelly?
→ They put tacks in their shoulder pads.

Why don't blondes eat bananas?
→ They can't find the zipper.
→ They cant find the pull tab.

What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease?
→ Her IQ goes up!

Why do blondes drive VWs?
→ Because they can spell it.