Newest jokes

What do men and pantyhose have in common?
→ They either cling, run or don't fit right in the crotch!

What's the best way to kill a man?
→ Put a naked woman and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one

If a man is bald at the front, he is a thinker.

If he is bald at the back, he is sexy.

If he is bald from front to back - he thinks he is sexy.

When I was growing up I used to lick all the kids on the block except for the Browns...

They were boys.

What do jello and a woman have in common?
→ They both wiggle when you eat them.

A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South.

He got a ride from a mean-looking redneck trucker. After riding about 30 miles in silence, the youth finally said:

- Well, aren't you going to ask me?

- Ask you what?

- If I'm a boy or a girl.

- Don't matter. Gonna fuck ya anyway.

How can you tell if your date really digs oral sex?
→ She hikes up her skirt every time you yawn.

Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life?
→ Because if you'll eat that stuff, you'll eat anything.

Two young girls were talking about their sex lives when the first girl says:

- Oh my god!, it was really great, but I was Sooo scared after his rubber broke. I didn't get a good night's sleep for a week.

- What happened. - Says her intrigued friend.

- I didn't know what I was going to do, but I was finally able to get the last little piece of it out with dental floss.

Two bikers were talking at a bar.

- How's married life? - asks the first.

- It's fine - says the second.

- How's the sex? - asks the first.

- Fine - says the second,

- At least I don't have to wait in line!