Ways To Annoy Others

- Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

- If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

- Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

- Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

- Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

- Practice making fax and modem noises.

- Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc." them to your boss.

- Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

- Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

- Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

- Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

- Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

- Adjust the background color on your email so that all your email correspondence is in green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

- Staple papers in the middle of the page.

- Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

- Honk and wave to strangers.

- Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

- TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.. type only in lowercase. dont use any punctuation either

- Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

- Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

- As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

- Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

- Ask people what gender they are.

- While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

- Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

- Sing along at the opera.