Business Jokes

If an accountant's wife cannot sleep, what does she say?
→ "Darling, could you tell me about your work."

A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Want to hear an accountant joke?"

The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know that I'm 6 feet tall, 200 pounds, and I'm an accountant. And the guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, 225 pounds, and he's an accountant. Now, do you still want to tell that joke?"

The first guy says, "No, I don't want to have to explain it two times."

Why accountants don't read novels?
→ Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.

If FedEx and Ups merged, would they call it Fed UP?

How does AVON find so many women willing to take orders?

If all the nations in the world are in the debt, where did all the money go?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

A man wanted a new aardvark so he looked through the classified ads. He phoned a number he found and an elderly lady answered.

"How much are your aardvarks?" he asked.

"They're L6 each," came the reply.

"Did you raise them yourself?" inquired the man.

"Oh yes," she said, "Yesterday they were only L5 each."

- This computer you charged me L950 for doesn't work....and you said it would be trouble free.

- It is, I charged you L950 for the computer, but you're getting all that trouble absolutely free!

How many IBM employees does it take to change a light bulb?
→ Fifteen. Five to do it, and ten to write document number GC7500439-001, Multitasking Incadescent Source System Facility, of which 10% of the pages state only "This page intentionally left blank".