Newest jokes

- So you are distantly related to the family next door, are you?

- Yes - their dog is our dog's brother.

The Long Walk Home by Miss D. Buss

The Punished Schoolboy by Major Bumsaw

The Spicy Sausage by Delia Katessen

Aches and Pains by Arthur Ritis

How to Feed Elephants by P. Nutts

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.

Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.

She showed him the instructions on the tin:

- For best results, put on two coats.

A blonde was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop, someone asked:

- Where did you get that?

The pig replied:

- I won her in a raffle!

The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

- Six please - she said.

- I could never eat twelve!

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting:

- I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!

The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells:

- You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little idiot on your knee!