Newest jokes

What word allows you to take away two letters and get one?
→ Stone.

An Irishman went into a post office to see if there were any letters for him.

- I'll see, sir, - said the clerk.

- What is your name?

- You're having me on now because I'm Irish, - said the Irishman.

- Won't you see the name on the envelope?

An old lady walked in to the post office to buy stamps and as she was short-sighted the clerk offered to stick the stamps on for her.

- Wait a minute, - he said.

- you've written the address upside down.

- I know, - said the little old lady.

- the letter is going to Australia.

- 1st vampire: How things?

- 2nd vampire: Terrible! Today I received a letter saying I'm overdrawn by 50 pints at the blood bank.

I got an anonymous letter today.
Oh, really - who was it from?!

- Teacher: Fred, give me a sentence starting with "I."

- Fred: I is . . .

- Teacher: No, Fred. You must always say "I am."

- Fred: Oh, right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

How did skeletons send each other letters in the days of the Wild West?
→ By Bony Express.

Betty was scribbling industriously over some paper with a pencil when her mother asked her what she was drawing.

- I'm not drawing, Mom - she said indignantly:

- I'm writing a letter to Fred.

- But you can't write - Mom pointed out.

- That's all right - said Betty:

- Fred can't read.

What did the werewolf write at the bottom of the letter?
→ Best vicious . . .

Last night I wrote myself a letter.
But I forgot to sign it and now I don't know who it's from.