Newest jokes

Heard about the Polish hockey team?

They all drowned in spring training.

Hear what the Poles did with all their gold medals?

Went home and got them bronzed.

A Polak was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositiories. A week later the Pole complained to the doctor that they didn't produce the desired results.

- Have you been taking them regulary? - the doctor asked.

- What do you think I've been doing, - the Pole said, - Shoving them up my ass?

Did you hear about the gay Polak?

He slept with women.

A Polak was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued.

His attackers then proceeded to go through his pockets.

- You mean you fought like that for 57 cents? - asked one of the muggers incredulously.

- Is that all you wanted? - moaned the Pole.

- I thought you were after the $400 in my shoe!

Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?
→ They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.

What did the Polish mother say when her daughter announced that she was pregnant?
→

- Are you sure it's yours?

Two Polaks are walking down opposite sides of a river when they notice each other. One invites the other one over.

- I can't swim - he replies.

- Why don't you come over here?

The other guy says:

- I can't swim, either. What are we gonna do?

First guy says:

- Wait! I got a flashlight. I'll turn it on, and you walk across the beam to this side.

The second guy replies:

- No way! I'll get half-way across, and you'll turn the flashlight off!

How did the Polish mother teach her son which way to put his underwear on?
→ Yellow in the front, brown in the back!

Did you hear about the Polish girl who tried to trade her menstrual cycle in on a Honda?