Dysfunctional Family Threats

- Finish your lima beans or you're not getting any heroin for dessert!

- If you don't stop that this instant, I'll have Grandma perform another striptease for you.

- If this plexiglass wasn't between us, I'd wash your mouth out with soap, young man.

- Do you want me to put a tofu burrito in your pants? Well? Do You?!

- Billy Bob, you finish them chores or Sis ain't goin' to the prom with ya!

- Eat your brussel sprouts, or Mommy won't love you anymore.

- Lyle, Erik -- either behave, or go to your suites!

- If you don't eat your peas, Chelsea, I'll make you stay at the Gingrich's house!

- Don't make me put you back in the womb!

- As long as you live under this roof, you're going to wear that dress, young man!

- You just wait til your father gets paroled!

- Stop crying, Lourdes, or Uncle Dennis will kick you in the groin.

- Young lady, don't make me send you to the Citadel!

And the Number 1 Threat Used in Dysfunctional Families...

- All right, Little Mister, no more time in the sheep pen for you!