You Know You're a Teacher

- You think people should be required to get a government permit before being allowed to reproduce.

- You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to have all your holidays and summers free."

- You believe "shallow gene pool" should have it's own box on the report card.

- You believe the staff room should have a Valium salt lick.

- When out in public, you feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior.

- When you mention "vegetables" and you're not talking about a food group.

- You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.

- You wonder how some parents even managed to reproduce.

- You can't have children of your own, because there is no name you could give a child that wouldn't bring on high blood pressure the moment you heard it.

- You really encourage an obnoxious parent to check into home schooling.